A Few Goodbyes Worth Sharing.

The Things I'll Miss the Most

Alex & I


I love ya'll.
Talk to you in 18 months.

Need a Little Pick-Me-Up??

Roller Coaster Terror

My cousins and I went to Silverwood the other day and let me just say, riding with Lindsey was certainly a pleasure. She's never ridden a roller coaster before so as you can imagine, it was quite the experience. And I swear this video could cure cancer.

Baby Sitting Blues

In April I was hired as a babysitter.
Two girls & one boy.
Ages 9, 6, & 4.

At first, I was completely overwhelmed by how much attention each one of them needed in order to act....like a normal child. Normal meaning of course, that they would sit still for more than 5 minutes. I thought I was a pretty good babysitter up until this point in my life. They proved that theory wrong in less than a day. However, through these past five months, Katherine, Victoria, and Daniel have taught me some of the most important lessons a mom will ever learn. Because lets face it, I was a mom while watching them. I was their Friday Mom. (& sometimes their Wednesday Mom and Monday Mom.) Now that it's finally over, I realize I'm going to miss so much more than just their cute little faces.

I will miss the 1960's Tv show "H.R. Pufnstuf" we used to watch before eating dinner.
I will miss coming up with clever ways to get Daniel to do what I say.
I will miss making a crap ton of PB&J's.
I will miss taking Katherine to Gymnastics.
I will miss going to swim lessons.
I will miss Daniel painting my nails.
I will miss Victoria clinging to my legs.
I will miss Daniels outside hugs.

And most of all, I will miss my kids.

"I have 2 girls here in tears looking at your photo booth pictures. :( And Daniel just made you a picture and decorated it with jewel stickers. You will truly be missed."

>Five minutes later<
"And Katherine just made you her phones wallpaper."
>One minute later<
"I just saw Katherines texts.......she's pretty torn up. Now Daniels whimpering and saying he's sad because he wants you back too. Oh my. They really love you too :) Thank you for taking such amazing care of them these past months."

Photographs & Memories

1,2,3,4

(1) I said goodbye to my best friend yesterday. And I honestly don't know which was harder, seeing her cry? Or letting her go? I'm so thankful for her.

(2) My brother Steven got hitched yesterday. Katelyn is now officially a Porter girl. God bless. 

(3) They finally sent us pictures from the reunion.

 (4) Self Explanatory. I will miss them so much.

We've Been Doing Fun Things

I promise to write paragraph after paragraph soon. (Because soon is all I got.)
But for now, I'll share some of my most favorite snaps of the past couple days.

Your Song

I like him. I like him a lot in fact.
But I can't tell him.
............................

And the worst part is, I'll never know if he liked/likes me back.

1.  "I'm stuck on a boy who fills me with joy. I knew I was wrong to jump straight on into this picture so pretty, but he is so pretty to me."
2.  "Why can't I breath whenever I think about you? Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you?"
3.  "Ugh, what's a matter with me? You'd think a girl would learn..."

Maybe by the time these next 18 months roll by I'll forget him.
Here's hopin.

I Watch Sports. I Swear.

I have a favorite movie for each (okay not each) sport. Don't you?

Baseball: 42

Basketball: Hoosiers

Football: Remember the Titans

Soccer: She's the Man

Rugby: Forever Strong

Cheer Leading: Bring it On

Ice Skating: Ice Castles (New version)

Wrestling: Nacho Libre

Boxing: Rocky

Dance: Step Up

Gymnastics: Stick It

Swimming: On a Clear Day

Taylor Swift'd It.

That's right. I'm making this blog post extremely personal. It's time I address how I feel about my past relationships. So ladies, let's talk ex's. (This only includes the boys who made it into either my "unmentionables" book or my AP-BIO sized boy book.)
*Clarification* although that book is huge, there are few males listed. It's mainly filled with memories, letters, Sawyer, etc.

The first ex that started it all goes to: (drumroll)

David. I count this as my first relationship because even though it began way back in middle school, it never really officially ended. (or received full closure until about...hmmm...June of this year.) That may come as a surprise to a few of you but like I mentioned earlier, this is honesty hour. And I'm telling you now that although we ended things officially a long time ago, I had always wondered "what if." Now that I know, I can honestly say that I'm "sooo over it." And because I've entitled this blog post "Taylor Swift'd It" I think it only appropriate that I dedicate one final song to each of the boys. So David, if you ever read this, here's my song to you. The Reason-Hoobastank
(I could have chosen a song about how I feel now that we're older but I'd rather think of you as the nice boy I fell in like with at a church dance.) 

The second ex I wish never had to be an "ex" goes to:

Sawyer. I have never loved anyone as much as I loved Sawyer. It's not even the fact that our relationship was perfect, because it wasn't. There was just something about the year and a half I spent with him that changed my life entirely. I went through some of the hardest times of my life with him. We were innocent, young, & so many other things that made our relationship so hard to get over. *Honesty Hour* It ended badly. And by badly I mean tragic. After 18 months of what to me seemed like a solid relationship, things happened. Parents got involved. Feelings got hurt. Communication was cut off as he was grounded from me several times. And eventually jealousy and hurt took over and I broke things off. A few months later he was dating my best friend. & My heart has never been the same. Nor has my relationship with said best friend. Although we haven't talked since the summer of 2010, I think about him all the time. He was my first love, and you know what they say about first loves....they're never forgotten. So Sawyer, even though I know you'll never read this or even think twice about the girl you once dated in high school, this is my song for & about you. Near to You-A Fine Frenzy
"He and I had something beautiful but so dysfunctional it couldn't last...Loved him so, but I let him go, cuz' i knew he'd never love me back. Such pain as this shouldn't have to be experienced. I'm still reeling from the loss, still a little bit delirious...."

The third ex (and the fourth and the fifth and the sixth and the seventh ex) goes to:

Easton. Boy oh' boy. We broke up so many times its unbelievable. And though our relationship lasted a long, long time, I was never the gal for you. I think we knew it way back when we were freshmen. You should never have to fight for the one you love, Easton. She should choose you first, not second. As we spent so many months apart, we were able to learn very important lessons that would help and prepare us for our future. They say that the people who enter into our lives are either a blessing or a lesson. I think you were both. You blessed me as I needed someone to lean on while my family went through some pretty intense times, and you helped me to learn what it is I truly want in a husband. So thanks, and I hope you have a wonderful and happy life. My song for you is Perfectly-By Chelsea Lee

That's it guys. Three. Two real boyfriends & One "thing" that lasted a long time. I know I seem like the girl who has a million boy toys but in all honesty,
1. When I like a guy, I really like the guy. So if you're the boy who claims that I flirt with a million boys and have a million boyfriends, stop being so jealous.
2. My heart is still mending from a break up that happened years ago.
3. I'm 19. & a girl. & single. I have a right to flirt.
4. My record is still shorter than Taylor Swifts. And she's famous...sooo....I think I'm doin' alright.

*Disclaimer* I have had four flings/potentials between and after the ex's I have previously listed but they didn't have as much as an impact on me as these three did. Sorry if ya'll feel left out.

Until next time,
xoxo

Drop A Disney Question

1. Favorite Character: Peter Pan
2. Favorite Villain: Madame Medusa (The Sword in the Stone)
3. Favorite Hero: Hercules (for obvious reasons)
4. Favorite Heroine: Meg (for her sarcasm and wit.)
5. Favorite Princess: Belle
6. Favorite Prince: Eric
7. Favorite Animal Sidekick: Mushu (Mulan)
8. Favorite Human Sidekick: Kronk (Emperors New Groove) He's obviously the best.
9. Favorite Princess Movie: Enchanted
10. Favorite Non-Princess Movie: Childhood: Homeward Bound Teenage: Remember the Titans Adult: Man from Snowy River
11. Favorite Scene: "If I never Knew You" Scene (But there are SO many to choose from)
12. Favorite Song: "Let me be your wings" (Thumbelina)
13. Favorite Couple: Flynn Ryder & Rapunzel (I'm biased because Zachary Levi plays Flynn)
14. Favorite Kiss: Steamiest Disney Animated Kiss goes to Pocahontas and John Smith
15. Favorite Hair: Merida (Brave)
16. Favorite Fairy: Jiminy Cricket (he's like...a male fairy. Kinda.)
17. Favorite Dance: High School Musical 
18. Favorite Sequel: Princess Diaries 2 The Royal Engagement
19. Favorite Disney Musical: Newsies
20. Favorite Old School Disney: You Lucky Dog, Luck of the Irish, Smart House, Motorcrossed, The 13th Year, & Every Halloweentown
21. Favorite Setting: Neverland
22. Favorite Disney Soundtrack: I love them all. But even though Anastasia & The Swan Princess are not considered a disney movie, they are my favorite animated soundtracks.
23. Favorite Ride At Disneyland: Space Mountain. (Its a difficult choice)
24. Favorite Ride At Disneyworld: Never been
25. Favorite ending of a movie: Meet the Robinsons (Also makes me tear up...EVERY TIME)
26. A Scene/moment that never fails to make you cry or tear up: The Up love Story
27. A Scene in any Disney movie you wish you could experience: The Chronicles of Narnia. All of it.
28. Which world/setting would you want to live in the most? The Jungle from Mighty Joe Young
29. Which Disney Character are you most like? Lizzie McGuire (Believe it or not, she's Disney)
30. Which Disney Character can you relate to the most? Pumbaa. (The Lion King)

New Discoveries

Aprilemade- For Fans Of: The Civil Wars, Ingrid Michaelson, NeedtoBreathe,Coldplay, A Fine Frenzy
Bordeen- For Fans Of: Imagine Dragons, Walk Off The Earth, Of Monsters And Men, Coldplay, The Killers
Brandi Carlile- For Fans Of: The Avett Brothers, Ray LaMontagne, Indigo Girls,Johnny Cash, Grace Potter & The Nocturnals
Chase Coy- For Fans Of: William Fitzsimmons, Peter Bradley Adams, The Civil Wars, The Weepies, Rocky Votolato
The Lighthouse and the Whaler- For Fans Of: Of Monsters and Men, Young the Giant, Freelance Whales, Vampire Weekend, Mumford & Sons
The Paper Kites- For Fans Of: Ben Howard, Blind Pilot, The Lumineers, Of Monsters and Men, Bon Iver
Sara Groves- For Fans Of: Sarah McLachlan, Patty Griffin, Keith Green
The Tourist Company- For Fans Of: The Paper Kites, Of Monsters and Men, Mumford & Sons, Fleet Foxes, The Oh Hello's
William Fitzsimmons- For Fans Of: Elliott Smith, Bon Iver, Iron & Wine, Nick Drake
Jillian Edwards- For Fans Of: Priscilla Ahn, Ingrid Michaelson, Alison Krauss, Mindy Smith

*Jillian Edwards is my highest recommendation for the ladies. She's amazeballs.

Makes Me Wanna....

Theres something about teeny-bopper music that just makes me wanna:
-Party
-Drive with the windows rolled down
-Drink Soda from a straw (you know, the old school kind.)
-Order fast food at midnight
-Dance like a fool
-Have a girls night which ends with a serious slumber party (pj dance parties is a must.)
-Talk about boys
-Wear a dress, curl my hair, and wear high heels
-Paint my nails some crazy neon color
-Go shopping

You get the point.

Miss Movin' On: I really hated Fifth Harmony while they were on the show, but now their 2 singles seemed to be on repeat.
Me & My Girls: See what I mean?
Best Song Ever: One Direction. It makes me sad to think I'll miss their movie premiere by like...9 days.

Photo Booth Timeline.

About 40 pictures of Wendy and I

About 7 pictures of my new (now old) haircut

About 25 pictures of Michael hijacking my computer

About 10 pictures of Ashley and I

About 15 selfies

About 3 pictures showing off my Wisdom Teeth Cheeks

Hello Again :)

This week I had the opportunity to pick my sister up from BYU-Idaho. Lucky for me, my old roommates hadn't left yet.

I love them so much, my heart just breaks thinking I might never see them again. Such angels in my life. They will never be forgotten. <3
(From Left to Right: Cass (Cassidy), Sabs (Sabrina), Me, & Kaywa (Kayla).)

Q&A Sesh.

• 1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it? No. 
• 2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now? I'm only 19. So yes.  
• 3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time? These next 7 days ;)
• 4. Would you ever smile at a stranger? I do it everyday. 
• 5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? Love is a battlefield. So yes. 
• 6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today? Yes. It's Sunday. I'm thinking of Jesus Christ. 
• 7. What exactly are you wearing right now? T-shirt and Jeans. 
• 8. How often do you listen to music? 24/7.
• 9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? Sweeattssss. I nearly despise jeans. 
• 10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2014? Nah, i'll still be in Georgia.
• 11. Are you a social or an antisocial person? Both actually. 
• 12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’? Yes, an Andrew.
• 13. What about ‘R’? No. 
• 14. Can you drive a stick shift? Yikes. Definitely not. 
• 15. Do you care if people talk badly about you? I'd like to say no, but I really do care. 
• 16. Are you going out of town soon? Tuesday. (Family Reunion)
• 17. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday. Hey, I was watching a movie. 
• 18. Have you ever told someone you loved them? Yes. 
• 19. If you could change your eye color, would you? Nope. 
• 20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for? Yes. But no names. 
• 21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having. There's nothing to complain about.
• 22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead? Yes. I'm all for it. 
• 23. Are you dating the last person you talked to? No.
• 24. What are you sitting on right now? My bed. 
• 25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? Yes. 
• 26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have? It's the problem i'm currently faced with. 
• 27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night? Christian.
• 28. Do you get a lot of colds? Not really. 
• 29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from? The 5k Christian and I ran yesterday. 
• 30. Does anyone hate you? Probably. You can't win them all. 
• 31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? Yeah, riiigggggght. 
• 32. Do you like watching scary movies? HAH. no. 
• 33. Do you want your tongue pierced? Gag me. 
• 34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? Junior year. High school. 
• 35. Did you have a dream last night? Yes. 
• 36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them? December. (outside of my family)
• 37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years? Hope so. 
• 38. Do you think someone has feelings for you? Yes. 
• 39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? Probably not....
• 40. Did you have a good day yesterday? Yes. 
• 41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship? No. 
• 42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl? hmm.....No. My girlfriends are all gone. 
• 43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you? Yes. And now look, they've lost me. 
• 44. What’s the best part about school? When it's over. 
• 45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook? I'm a girl, what do you think?
• 46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school? Before cell phones, yes. 
• 47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head? I'm a girl. So, yes. 
• 48. Were you single over the last summer? Yes & No. Easton and I were on and off. 
• 49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago? Hmmm...no. 
• 50. What are you supposed to be doing right now? Nothing in particular. 
• 51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with? Nope. 
• 52. Are you nice to everyone? I try to be. 
• 53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? HAHAHAHAHAHA. For sure. 
• 54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? Been there, done that. 
• 55. Are you good at hiding your feelings? Yes. 
• 56. Do you think you like someone? Think? No. I KNOW I like someone. 
• 57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’? .....No?
• 58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys? Boys. But it'd be nice to have tight GF's. 
• 59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry? Yes. 
• 60. Do you hate anyone? NEVER. 
• 61. How’s your heart? Trying to un-like someone. 
• 62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? Yes. 
• 63. Have you ever cried over a guy? Hah. Hasn't everyone?
• 64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now? I'd rather not name names. 
• 65. Are your toenails painted pink? Nope, purple. 
• 66. Will your next kiss be a mistake? Hopefully not. 
• 67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct? Yes. 
• 68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public? Pulled down. 
• 69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with? My boss. 
• 70. How do you look right now? Pretty cute. My hairs curled. 
• 71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around? My family. 
• 72. Can you commit to one person? Yes. 
• 73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to? No. 
• 74. Have you ever felt replaced? Yes. 
• 75. Did you wake up cranky? No. 
• 76. Are you a jealous person? I don't think so. 
• 77. Are relationships ever worth it? Yes. 
• 78. Anyone you’re giving up on? Yes. 
• 79. Currently wanting to see anyone? Yes. 
• 80. Name something you have to do tomorrow? Pack. 
• 81. Last person you cried in front of? My mom. 
• 82. Is there someone you will never forget? Yes, Sawyer. (Oh great, I named a name.)
• 83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you? Doubt it. HAH. 
• 84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? Talking.
• 85. Are you over your past? Yes/No. 
• 86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex? Yes. 
• 87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to? No. 
• 88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? YES. 
• 89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? That'd be odd. But sure. 
• 90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? Yes. 
• 91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months? No. 
• 92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael? Yes. 
• 93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew? No. 
• 94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going? Nope, we had broken up by then. 
• 95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March? I wasn't in a relationship. 
• 96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? Yes. My sister is very beautiful. 
• 97. Who do you have texts from? Boys and Girls. 
• 98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? Cool story, bro. 
• 99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? Yes. 
• 100. Who’s in your profile picture with you? My sister. 
• 101. Ever kissed under fireworks? No. 
• 102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies? Yes.